My Personal Story:
A few weeks ago, I remember feeling so excited and happy as I reflected on how much I was able to do these past 11 months. Then suddenly, that excitement shifted to a sense of guilt or feeling bad as I thought, "Dang, I wasn't able to travel as much before my mom made her glorious transition Nov 1,2022 because I was her full-time caregiver, and taking care of her was my #1 priority." I felt bad for a moment and then processed that survivor's remorse and moved on with my day.
Since then, I have been feeling extremely fatigued. Initially, I attributed it to the ongoing pain caused I've been in since the accident in April that caused by severe nerve damage, which often flares up, causing my daily pain level to skyrocket from a 5 to a 10 on the pain scale. It stops me in my tracks and has even led me to the emergency room . However, despite the pain medication, the extreme fatigue did not dissipate.
As someone who thrives on being active and on the go, feeling excessively fatigued and mentally drained has been debilitating. It felt as if I was sinking into depression. This thought lingered in my mind until last night when, through a series of self-reflection questions, I had a realization. I had been thinking a great deal about my mom lately, and although I didn't seem sad or actively grieving, the underlying sorrow and grief had manifested as extreme fatigue and increased feelings of tiredness. This revelation reminded me of how seasonal depression can manifest.
The Intesectuon of Grief and Seasonal Depression
Grief and seasonal depression are complex emotional experiences that can intertwine in unexpected ways. The approaching anniversary of a loved one's death and the changing seasons can both evoke intense emotions, impacting our mental well-being. In this blog, we will explore how these two processes intersect and offer strategies for coping with the challenges they bring.
1. The Anniversary Effect:
As the anniversary of a loved one's passing draws near, we may find ourselves unconsciously grieving. Memories, emotions, and thoughts associated with the loss resurface, sometimes catching us off guard. The approaching anniversary acts as a catalyst, stirring up a mix of emotions that can be challenging to navigate.
2. Unresolved Grief:
The grieving process is unique to each individual, and it doesn't always follow a linear path. Unconsciously, we may experience waves of grief leading up to the anniversary. Our minds attempt to process the loss and its significance, sometimes bringing unresolved emotions to the surface. It's important to acknowledge and honor these feelings, allowing ourselves to grieve in a healthy and compassionate way.
3. Seasonal Influence:
Seasonal changes can have a profound impact on our mood and overall well-being. Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), commonly associated with winter, is characterized by a dip in mood during specific seasons. Similarly, the approaching anniversary coinciding with a particular season can intensify emotions and contribute to a sense of sadness or low mood. Understanding this seasonal influence can help us prepare and develop coping strategies.
4. Shared Symptoms:
Grieving before an anniversary and seasonal depression can manifest similar symptoms. These may include feelings of sadness, irritability, changes in appetite or sleep patterns, lack of energy, and social withdrawal. Recognizing these shared experiences can help us differentiate between the normal grieving process and the influence of seasonal factors.
a. Seek Support: Reach out to trusted loved ones or join support groups where you can share your feelings and experiences. Connecting with others who understand can provide comfort and a sense of belonging.
b. Self-Care Practices: Engage in activities that nurture your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. This may include exercise, spending time in nature, practicing mindfulness or meditation, and pursuing hobbies that bring you joy.
c. Establish Routines: Creating a structure in your daily life can provide stability and a sense of control. Set realistic goals, maintain a consistent sleep schedule, and prioritize self-care activities.
d. Professional Help: Consider seeking professional counseling or therapy. A mental health professional can offer guidance, support, and specialized techniques to help you navigate both grief and seasonal depression.
e. Rituals and Remembrance: Engage in rituals or remembrance activities that honor your loved one's memory. This could involve lighting a candle, writing in a journal, or visiting a place that holds significance for you.
Grieving and seasonal depression can intersect, amplifying the emotional challenges we face. By understanding the anniversary effect, recognizing the influence of seasons, and implementing coping strategies, we can navigate this complex terrain with compassion and resilience. Remember, it's okay to not be ok seek support and prioritize self-care as you honor your loved one's memory and take care of your own well-being.
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